The Essential Series:
Your Guide to Living Alcohol-Free Later in Life
Transitioning to an Alcohol-Free Lifestyle: What It Does and Doesn’t Take
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We all reach a point where we start considering an alcohol-free lifestyle as an alternative. It sounds appealing, but the uncertainty of what it truly takes to start and maintain an alcohol-free life can be overwhelming.
In this episode, I'll guide you in reflecting on your thoughts about the requirements and misconceptions surrounding transitioning to an alcohol-free lifestyle in midlife and beyond.
This episode is for you if you are curious about an alcohol-free lifestyle or are already living alcohol-free but find it's not what you expected.
What you will hear:
What a transition into an alcohol-free lifestyle looks like
My beliefs and expectations about what my future would hold if I wasn't drinking
Five common expectations that many women have about going alcohol-free, including feeling isolated, the need for absolute certainty, expecting a specific timeframe to stop thinking about drinking, feeling pressured by others, and assuming the same habits and routines must remain.
The five essentials of what it actually takes to transition successfully, including the importance of connection, conversation, and community (the 3 C's), self-awareness and willingness to explore an alcohol-free lifestyle, giving yourself time and being patient, making a commitment to yourself for your own sake, and gradually implementing small changes to your habits and routines.
How to spend time (today) reflecting and documenting your thoughts and ideas about going alcohol-free
Related episodes:
Coming to Terms with Sobriety
Life Before and After Getting Sober with Claire Pooley
Going Alcohol-Free Later in Life
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5 Essential Questions to Ponder to Help You Take a Break From Drinking
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If you're unsure about drinking or taking a break, you're not alone. Many women in midlife are choosing the road less traveled and exploring the benefits of abstaining from alcohol.
In this bonus episode, I'll guide you through 5 Essential Questions to Help You Take a Break from Drinking.
What you will hear:
Identify experiences that matter more to you than daily drinking.
Understand why those experiences hold importance for you.
Explore your motivations for drinking and the role alcohol plays in your life.
Discover alternative ways to manage those motivations without alcohol.
Create a supportive environment that aligns with your decision to take a break.
During the episode, I'll also discuss the benefits of taking a break from drinking and share strategies for managing life without alcohol.
At the end, there's a bonus question to help you assess your current relationship with alcohol.
I understand these questions may not be easy to answer, so take your time to reflect on them.
By taking small steps and asking yourself empowering questions, you can take action and create positive change.
I'm with you!
Mentioned in this episode:
The Essential Series: Your Guide to Living Alcohol-Free
Subscribe to the To 50 and Beyond email community for weekly episodes delivered every Tuesday.
Transitioning to an Alcohol-Free Lifestyle: What it Does and Doesn't Take
Exploring Your Relationship with Alcohol and Why it Matters
Related episodes:
Why I Quit Drinking at 45
Going Alcohol-Free Later in Life
3 Ways to Make Living Alcohol-Free Possible
5 Practical Tips to Help You Stop Drinking in Midlife and Beyond
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Finding practicality and simplicity in early sobriety is essential to prevent overwhelm and stress, which can motivate you to drink.
I chose a practical approach to sobriety, because that is all I knew then. With so many different tips available today to help you stop drinking, it can get confusing on how to start and keep it going.
In this episode, I'll guide you through 5 practical tips that you can get started on today.
This episode is for you if you are curious about an alcohol-free lifestyle or are already living alcohol-free and need some extra encouragement to keep it going.
What you'll hear:
How to focus on Plan A: Make an unwavering commitment to living an alcohol-free lifestyle as your top priority.
Why writing your intention to stay sober down daily will help reinforce your commitment to yourself and center you during challenging moments.
How to identify your drinking window: Recognize the time of day when you typically start drinking and create alternative activities and strategies to navigate those vulnerable periods without alcohol.
Why documenting your day will help you manage your thoughts and emotions without drinking and give you a great resource to reflect on in the future.
How to reward yourself by celebrating yourself: Embrace self-pride and motivation by cheering for your accomplishments and successes along the way, cultivating a positive mindset without the need for alcohol.
One of my favorite bonus tips to help you feel loved and comforted throughout the day.
Mentioned in this episode:
Episode 254: Transitioning to an Alcohol-Free Lifestyle: What it Does and Doesn't Take
Bonus: 5 Essential Questions to Ponder to Help You Take a Break From Drinking
Related episodes:
How to Start a Journal Practice with Noelle Van Vlierbergen
Why Drinking is Harder in Midlife than Sobriety
Getting Sober Over 60 with Janet Gourand
How to Challenge Your Drinking Stories for a Fresh Perspective
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We all have a inner dialogue that wants to remind of us the "good times" of drinking when we are working on being alcohol-free.
These stories as annoying and are not a reason to go back to drinking.
In this bonus episode, I'll guide you through an exercise to help you challenge your drinking stories and stay the course of alcohol freedom.
What you will hear:
The 5 most common "stories" shared among midlife women, including me: "I can have just one drink," "no one will know if I drink," "It's a lovely day for a drink, "I don't want to miss out on friend time," and "I deserve a drink."
Why challenging your drinking stories matters to help you stay alcohol-free.
How to find a fresh perspective within each story to help you keep going and growing in your a/f lifestyle.
You must put forth the effort it takes to CHALLENGE yourself like only you can if you want to be alcohol-free.
I'm with you!
Mentioned in this episode:
The Essential Series: Your Guide to Living Alcohol-Free
Subscribe to the To 50 and Beyond email community for weekly episodes delivered every Tuesday.
Related episodes:
Socializing Without Drinking Alcohol
Midlife Women and Drinking
You Don't Have to Skip to the Good Part of Sobriety
5 Essential Solutions to Help You Manage Cravings and Urges Without Drinking
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When you stop drinking, it is normal to crave a drink and feel the urge to drink. You are never alone in fighting the good fight to stay alcohol-free during these tempting moments.
In this episode, I will guide you through 5 essential solutions that can help you effectively manage the urge to drink and empower yourself to step into the leading role you were meant to play in your life.
By taking action in the moment of craving or urge, you can break the cycle of drinking and learn new ways to manage cues (triggers) without drinking.
The 5 Essential Solutions you'll hear are:
No. 1: Pause, Identify, and Accept: Mindfully acknowledge cravings, identify their triggers, and accept them as a natural part of the process.
No. 2: Make your space alcohol-free friendly: Create a supportive environment at home by removing alcohol, adding positive reminders, and using post-it notes for affirmations.
No. 3: "Roll Tape" Visualization: Visualize the potential outcomes of drinking or staying alcohol-free to reinforce your motivations and goals.
No. 4 Create a "Cravings Kit": Prepare a kit with distractions like puzzles, coloring books, and engaging activities to redirect your focus during cravings.
No. 5: Find Alternative Activities: Explore fulfilling and healthy activities to replace drinking temptations, such as exercise, affirmations, and connecting with supportive individuals.
Mentioned in this episode:
The Essential Series
25 Alcohol-Free Activities download
Dr. Amen
Dr. Amen Instagram
The Huberman Lab Podcast
Related episodes:
How to Start a Journal Practice with Noelle Van Vlierbergen
Why Drinking is Harder in Midlife than Sobriety
Getting Sober Over 60 with Janet Gourand
How to Build Your Alcohol-Free Muscle One Challenge At a Time
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Think of your alcohol-free (a/f) muscle as inner strength and determination to lead an alcohol-free lifestyle.
Whenever you encounter challenging situations like socializing, drinking thoughts, romanticizing alcohol because of the weather or vacation, or dealing with uncomfortable feelings and emotions, and you don’t reach for a drink, you're strengthening that "muscle."
In this episode, you'll hear:
The concept of an alcohol-free muscle and how it's built
How to turn your challenges into opportunities to grow and live life alcohol-free
The answer to a commonly asked question: When does not drinking get easier?
Mentioned in this episode:
The Essential Series: Your Guide to Living Alcohol-Free
Subscribe to the To 50 and Beyond email community for weekly episodes delivered every Tuesday.
Related episodes:
Why Drinking is Harder in Midlife Than Sobriety
Midlife Women and Drinking
Anchor Activities for Gray Area Drinkers with Casey M. Davidson
How to Create a Daily Plan to Help You Stay Alcohol-Free
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When I first quit drinking, I had no plan. After committing to an alcohol-free lifestyle, I woke up the next day feeling lost and uncertain. The day seemed long and daunting, and with no one else aware of my decision yet, fear crept in.
Looking back, I realize how much I held myself accountable to that commitment. However, for the first two years of sobriety, I lacked a clear daily focus beyond my basic responsibilities of taking care of my son and going to work.
In this episode, I talk about the importance of having a plan to stay alcohol-free and how it can help during challenging moments, and how to create an “all-day plan” that consists of three check-ins: morning, midday, and evening.
The Evening Check-In: Review and Reflect
Check-in with yourself: Ask, "How do I feel?" Listen and identify what you need to stay alcohol-free today.
Set your focus: Ask, "What do I need to stay alcohol-free tonight?" Clarify your intentions for the day ahead.
Reflect on your "why:" Reflect on your "why-power" and remind yourself of the reasons you choose not to drink.
Review your day: Take a moment to celebrate your accomplishments, acknowledge challenges, and express gratitude.
Plan for tomorrow: Prioritize 1-3 important tasks and commit to doing something kind for yourself, like an affirmation or a morning walk.
The Morning Check-In: Know Before You Go
Connect with yourself: Sit in silence, breathe, and identify your feelings and mindset for the day.
Practice gratitude: List or speak aloud things you are thankful for, including your commitment to being alcohol-free.
Plan your day: Consider your mood and energy, and decide what activities to prioritize or remove from your schedule.
Address challenges: Identify potential obstacles to staying alcohol-free and create strategies to overcome them.
Set intentions: Write down your goals for the day that support your choice to stay alcohol-free.
The Midday Check-In: A Friendly Reminder
How do you feel? Like checking in with a friend, ask yourself if you're hungry, angry, lonely, or tired (HALT). Take action to care for yourself—rest, journal, or take a short nap if needed. Follow your energy; if it's low vibe, honor it by easing your responsibilities. Remember, doing nothing is sometimes doing something for yourself.
Reaffirm your commitment: Remind yourself of your reason for staying alcohol-free. Write down your why-power multiple times if necessary to keep it strong.
Plan for the evening: Prepare your activity list to handle triggers to drink. Constantly reinforce these new habits to make them second nature.
Creating a daily plan is an excellent habit to build to help you find new ways to care for yourself. Listen to the episode for more tips!
Mentioned in this episode:
The Essential Series: Your Guide to Living Alcohol-Free in Midlife and Beyond
The Day by Daybook, by Noelle Van Vlierbergen
The Miracle Morning, by Hal Elrod
Related episodes:
10 Ways to Get in the Habit of Living Alcohol-Free
5 Essential Ways to Manage Cravings and Urges Without Drinking
5 Signs it May Be Time to Take a Break From Drinking
Midlife Sobriety: Common Questions and Concerns
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In the last five years, I've received lots of questions from women who are thinking about giving up alcohol later in life. In this episode, I'll answer the most common questions and worries you might have.
The purpose of this episode is to help you find the information you need and let you know that other women have similar concerns.
The most common questions addressed in this episode:
How did you know it was time to quit drinking?
How do you not talk yourself into drinking again?
What do I say to people when they ask why I’m not drinking?
How do I stand my ground when my spouse, partner, or friend tells me I can drink?
Is it normal to feel sad, angry, and lonely after you quit drinking?
How do you have fun without drinking?
How do you stay motivated?
Is sobriety trendy?
How do I manage sleep after I quit drinking?
How do I stay motivated to continue living alcohol-free?
The most common concerns addressed in this episode:
How to manage "forever" thinking when it comes to sobriety
The dangers and risks attributed to drinking alcohol
Addressing the language of not drinking: sober, sobriety, alcoholic, etc.
Overcoming feelings of loneliness and missing alcohol
Mentioned in this episode:
The Essential Series: Your Guide to Living Alcohol-Free
Episode #254: Transitioning to an Alcohol-Free Lifestyle: What it Does and Doesn't Take
Mingle Mocktails
25 Alcohol-Free Activities PDF
Subscribe to the To 50 and Beyond email community for weekly episodes delivered every Tuesday.
Related episodes:
Coming to Terms with Sobriety
Your Greatest Fear is Your Superpower with Lindsay Sutherland Boal
Going Alcohol-Free Later in Life
The Practice of “Being” Alcohol-Free
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When I stopped drinking, I realized quickly that so much of who I thought I was was tied to alcohol.
At 14, I stepped into my “party girl” image. I believed alcohol was the answer to my social anxiety and lack of confidence in who I was.
At 45, when I quit drinking, I had the same beliefs about alcohol, and I had a belief that I couldn’t “do life” without drinking.
I was wrong, but it took me “practicing being alcohol-free” to learn this.
In this episode, I talk about feeling out of touch with yourself when you give up alcohol, and I share a short lesson about my mini-course, The Alcohol-Free Habit Kickstart that helps you understand the importance of how our beliefs shape our behaviors.
Mentioned in this episode:
The Essential Series: Your Guide to Living Alcohol-Free in Midlife and Beyond
Atomic Habits, by James Clear
Related episodes:
How to Practice Mindfulness with Lane Kennedy
How to Challenge Your Drinking Stories for a Fresh Perspective
Three Ways to Make Living Alcohol-Free Possible
The 3 Types of People Who May Derail Your Alcohol-Free Journey
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One of the biggest fears most women face when deciding to choose an alcohol-free lifestyle is how their choice will impact their relationships.
Our choice to live free from alcohol should not be anything less than celebrated, especially by the people we love, but that is not always the case.
In this episode, I talk about how to set and uphold personal boundaries around three types of people that may derail your alcohol-free journey:
The Supporters: These folks respect your choice to no longer drink, and want to know what they can do to support you.
The Enablers: The enablers can also be supporters, they may say they respect your choice, but they also want to know when you’re going to drink with them again.
The Curious: The curious ones are people in your life who want to know why you aren’t drinking, and question your choice as if it’s unheard of not to drink alcohol.
Also in this episode, I share a short lesson from my 30-Day Challenge: The Alcohol-Free Habit Kickstart that helps you understand the importance of how our beliefs shape our behaviors.
Mentioned in this episode:
The Essential Series: Your Guide to Living Alcohol-Free in Midlife and Beyond
Team Alcohol-Free enrollment
Related episodes:
How to Handle Seasonal Drinking Reminders
Transitioning to an Alcohol-Free Lifestyle: What it Does and Doesn't Take
Three Ways to Make Living Alcohol-Free Possible
How to Keep Alcohol-Free Living Top of Mind Daily
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In this episode, I wrap up The Essential Series with words of encouragement and hope and a breakdown of how to keep your alcohol-free lifestyle top of mind daily which simply means: I will make myself and my alcohol-free lifestyle a priority because I care about myself and what I want more out of life than drinking alcohol.
I'll be sharing five practical strategies to help remind you of why you're choosing an alcohol-free lifestyle, show up for yourself daily, and enjoy the freedom that comes from living alcohol-free later in life.
Mentioned in this episode:
The Essential Series: Your Guide to Living Alcohol-Free in Midlife and Beyond
Team Alcohol-Free enrollment
Ann Dowsett-Johnston Ted Talk
Recovery is the New Black Instagram
Dr. Amen Instagram
Related episodes:
How to Handle Seasonal Drinking Reminders
Transitioning to an Alcohol-Free Lifestyle: What it Does and Doesn't Take
Three Ways to Make Living Alcohol-Free Possible